camp conversations from wo3

[bearestofthemall]

himiko you fucking shit

Sun Shang Xiang

Kai: Shang Xiang… do you remember the pact we beautiful ladies made?
Shang Xiang: B-beautiful ladies? What are you talking about, and what’s this about a pact?!
Kai: Don’t be silly! It was to get all the good-looking guys, right?

Shang Xiang: Hey, Kai, I don’t know about this pact we’ve made… And besides, I already…
Kai: Don’t tell me you’re going to take all of the men for yourself. According to the rules of our pact, traitors must be punished…
Shang Xiang: (I can’t say it… Why can’t I tell her that I’ve already found the one for me…?!)

Kai: … I get it, Shang Xiang. I know you’ve found someone you like. Actually, it couldn’t be any more obvious.
Shang Xiang: I’m sorry… But I don’t get it. How could a good woman like you not be attracting guys left and right?
Kai: I know, right?! We’ve got to bring this world back to normal! I’m going to smash this whole messed-up place to the ground! (KAI...)

Kaguya (MY BAE)

Kaguya: Excuse me, Lady Kai, I would like to ask you something,
Kai: Lady Kai, is it? Stop it. That is too formal! So come on, what is it, Kagu-chin?
Kaguya: Well... I... um...

Kaguya: Do you mind if I ask you something? What do you mean by "chin" when you call me Kagu-chin?
Kai: I heard it from a ninja friend of mine, so now I use it too. Isn't it so hopelessly cute?
Kaguya: Perhaps it can even build friendship. Then maybe I should grow to like it.

Kai: Come over here, Kagu-chin. Let me do your nails for you. (16th century japan has nail polish???)
Kaguya: Oh, um... thank you very much, Kai-chin.
Kai: Look at how pretty they are now. Be sure to come again. I can do that anytime you like!

Ujiyasu Hōjō

Kai: How extraordinary, Lord Hōjō. You have been separated from your beloved wife, but your determination remains.
Ujiyasu: Even here now, there are things that are important to me. Take a vassal like you, for example.
Kai: Did you say that I am important to you? I must serve you then with all my heart!

Ujiyasu: I am afraid you may have jumped to conclusions earlier. I think my back still hurts as well from where you slapped it.
Ujiyasu: Thank goodness I was not seriously injured. I'd never live it down if I got hurt before I even set foot out of camp.
Kai: Um, please remove your shirt for me. I'll check and make sure you're okay.

Kai: Please excuse my behavior from before. All the destruction I have seen must have poisoned my mind.
Ujiyasu: If ever my back gets injured, it's your fault. From here on, it is up to you to keep it safe.
Kai: Yes, sir! Isn't life wonderful? I will never let you die, Lord Hōjō! (HAHA...)

Himiko

Kai: Sigh. Why don't I have more luck with men... and how many times have I said that very thing?
Himiko: ...Come on, don't be depressed. I know, I'll teach you my secret bear-killing technique!
Kai: Hey, yeah! Then I can sneak up behind a man, knock him out, and... hey!

Himiko: Here's how it goes. You'll earn a reputation as a bear-killer, then lots of big strong men will come to challenge you.
Himiko: One day, a handsome one will show up, he'll "defeat" you, and from there... ah, true love!
Kai: Yeah, he'll break my monstrous grip, hold me tight, and then... s-shut up!

Himiko: You're hilarious, Kai! I don't think I can live without you anymore.
Himiko: Let's always be together forever and ever, okay, Kai?
Kai: I guess my only luck is with women. Next call, whenever you're ready...

Kotarō Fūma

Kai: Kotarō, where have those soft, cuddly dogs gone off to?
Kotarō: They were right beside me until a moment ago. Maybe they thought you looked hungry and ran?
Kai: As if I would be so cruel!

Kai: A short while ago, your dogs barked at me! What kind of manners are you teaching them?
Kotarō: Why, I taught them to bark whenever they see a bear.
Kai: I can't escape these bear jokes even from you?! I thought you of all people might be different. (AND NOT ME EITHER)

Kotarō: Maybe it is about time that you act obedient. That is, if you hope to be petted.
Kai: Sometimes even I feel a little down in the dumps...
Kotarō: There, there. What a lovely little pup you make. (THAT'S CREEPY, KOTARŌ)

Kunoichi

Kai: Hey, you! Come with me.
Kunoichi: Gah! You can't find a man, so you've given up on them entirely? Sorry, not interested!
Kai: Training! I was talking about training! You're impossible!

Kunoichi: Yeah, yeah... you want to train together. Sure thing, Bear Princess.
Kai: I'm glad to see you get it today. Although you still talk too much.
Kunoichi: As a ninja, I need to keep my edge, after all. Fighting a bear is a pretty good way to do it.

Kai: No man can compete with you. I knew it, you're the only training partner for me.
Kunoichi: Please, enough! I'm starting to get muscles like yours!
Kai: That only means the training is working! An era of muscle-bound women is about to begin!

Nemea

Kai: A warrior with good looks, tall and slender, a nice body... and dashing blond hair...
Kai: I know I've said I want to have better luck with men, but don't you think you're clearly out of my league...?
Nemea: ...What's the matter? Such a mysterious girl.

Nemea: You fight well, girl. I sense unlimited potential within you.
Kai: Potential...? Me...? Can I quote you on that?
Nemea: Of course. As long as you don't give in to your darkness... your potential will undoubtedly be realized.

Nemea: Your eyes are strong and pure. You are beautiful in the way you try to survive this senseless world.
Kai: Ooh! A-are you sure about that? Oh my... this is like a dream come true...!
Kai: Wait, maybe I am dreaming! Ooh, if this is a dream, I'm going to be so angry when I wake up! (no kai...)

FINALLY IM DONE